Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Sorting things out Volume I

“We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off.”
-Tyler Durden

Have you ever had so many things on your mind you didn't know where to start? Or so many topics you don't know which to write about?

Than is how I feel today. I was thinking about fitness, sorting life out, figuring out how to plan, making that plan, a product review, and more.

I could not decide where to start and I feel like I have many meaningful things to say and I know that if I take one road and not another I will forget. I remembered that I had seen a quote yesterday (above) and saved it in blogger. I decided to start I would go back the the saved post and just go from there.

 That quote is one of many from the movie Fight Club that resonates with me. I remember being raised with elementary teachers and my mom and other adults telling me I could be anything I want to be when I grow up. THAT SHIT IS A LIE!

There are several thing that never get said to young children or even older children.
1- You may pick a career you don't have the aptitude for.
2- You may pick a career you don't fully understand and once you pursue it and learn the ins and outs its a little harder to turn back and decide again.
3- You may pick a career that isn't suited for your personality.
4- Sometimes your life leads you down a road that prevent a career before you even know it.
5-You may pick a career that DOES work out with all of the above but by the time you are entering the "real world" we will have no idea about the economy so we don't know if that will be an option.

I will case study myself. Go figure. I remember when I was young I was aked by my mother what I wanted to be when I grew up. I remember standing in the hallway outside of my room in the house where we lived at the time and telling her either a preacher, or a fighter pilot, or a cowboy.

I had a love for jets as a kid so I was probably thinking about one of my many toys when I gave that answer. The truth that no one would have told me at that age is that that is a highly competitive field because they aren't that many jobs available. Next, to be competitive you have to have a lot of things going right for you and many of those skills are learned when young. Honestly it was about that time that I went off track. I speak about this particular job with good understanding as one of my two best friends from high school and my high school girl friend both did puruse this job for the Air Force, they both did ALL of the right things. In the end neither of them got it. Kera is a navigator and Nick is a pilot but of a KC-130 not a F-15 as he had dreamed. They both love what they do, but no one told them of the possible limitations when they were young. Of course as they got older they knew about the obstacles, but luckily it wasn't too late.

I think I answered preacher because my mom would like that answer. That one would work for most of my listed prereq's except that I really don't like people, CB says I have no emotions, and by the time I was older I had some interesting beliefs about organized religion. I am still religious, but don't agree with a lot of what I see or get told. This would probably be a problem for seminary.

Last in terms of being a cowboy my life had placed me in an urban area so training for that career wasn't an option.

I think its odd that I was never told these intricate details about career paths. I understand that at six decisions will change so it may not be worth getting into the details too deeply, but I think you see my point.

I grew up wanting to be a helicopter pilot from 3rd or 4th grade on. On my own I did the research, I knew I would need a college degree to fly for the military. I knew my estranged grandfather was an engineer and was successful so I figured that I would be one too. I even took two engineering classes in high school. At the time it seemed to make sense. When I was a senior in high school I started struggling with math; not because it was hard, but because I got bored too easily. It got worse in college, I was diagnosed with ADHD (I have since been told I do not have ADHD, but something else). I knew the military did not like to accept people taking vitamin r, as they called it, so I decided not be medicated. Without medication  the classes were too much so I changed my major to something with less math- Criminal Justice. I pursued this and did well in my classes, then the year before graduating I was told by a recruiter that because I had been diagnosed with asthma I could not join the military. This crashed everything down and I had to reevaluate.

This is an example of  how effect being whatever you want to be. I could even go on from there to what led me to my current career location.

Next week I turn 28 and I still have no idea where I want to be and what I want to do when I grow up. I guess the next few steps will be trying to decide where I want to be and how to get there.

Any suggestion for finding new directions?


TriMOEngr said...

I was one of the lucky ones (I'll call it luck anyway) that had a pretty strong picture of what I wanted to be when I grew up at a relatively young age and with an educated enough family to understand most of what it would take to get there. For 2 or 3 years in jr high and early high school, I was sure I wanted to be an architect. After a career day seminar on the subject, I realized I didn't have the artistic ability to do so and was steered towards engineering (by my physics teacher) where I could still build beautiful structures, but not have to be so artistic. I was solid in math and science and this was a good direction for me. Then, I got to the structural classes in college and they kicked my butt. I passed a class called "Reinforced Concrete Design" by promising the professor that I would never build a bridge. Thankfully, I found in college that I WAS very interested (and good at) most of the other areas of civil engineering.

Got out of college 16 years ago. I am now on my sixth "job". I learned something on each of those jobs - what I did and didn't want out of my career. But some lessons were hard. That naive 22 year old could have never imagined working with people who could care less about her, or would actually sabotage her success, or choose to pay her significantly less than a male counterpart, or lay her off in the prime of her career.

Yet, each of these legs of my journey have brought me to THIS (Darius Rucker reference - check out the song). My life is far from perfect. But I try to remember that I am the person I am today for all that I have been through and all the hard lessons I've learned. And maybe, this current tough lesson, will lead me to a new "this" that I can't even envision today. is all I have some days.

OK - so I told you 10x more than you wanted to know and really didn't answer your question. I think you are on the right path - seeking the answers to what will make you happy. I generally find that the answers are within us if we spend the time, in peace and quiet, to find them. I sometimes journal (or blog - yikes) to help myself figure it out. Sound familiar? :)

LB said...

when you get the answer, please let me know! i remember sitting in the career guidance center at college taking test after test and not being happy with the answers, and the counselor gave me some shitty answer like "well, i cant tell you what you want to be, only you can" no shit lady! i wanted to be a veterinarian, but didnt want to take the risk of getting a 4 year degree in a useless major and not be able to get into vet school. i changed my major so many times, biology, chemistry, criminal justice (WTF!), nursing, nutrition, sociology. end the end i chose to be a nurse not because i liked it or wanted to help people (heck, i dont even like people most of the time!), i chose it because it was safe. i knew i would always have a job. and i have been miserable for 10 years. i still dont know what i want to be when i grow up either.

Lucas R. Tucker said...

I never had a chance to take any batteries to see what I would like to do for a living.

I do remember taking the view books for various colleges I had applied to and circling all of the majors I found interesting. Maybe that was a problem to itself. Maybe my interests are too varied. OR maybe just because something seems fun to learn about or to do IN THEORY doesnt mean it will actually be fun.